Online shopping sites have whittled my savings account. Online dating sites have drastically decreased my fear of the first date. So why can't an online dieting site reduce my sagging bottom line just as easily? I mean losing weight the old fashioned way by counting points, weighing food portions, and planning menus is so 2006. Or so I thought. In my quest to shed that extra person I'm carrying around in my bulging tummy I've come to realize two things: 1) wearing tight pants does in fact make me eat less, and 2) dieting is dieting ... and it takes work ... even in 2007 with all that the Internet has to offer.
Silly me. I really thought that by paying a few dollars a week to a well-respected Web site, I could get someone else to do the thinking for me. See I really really don't like spending time creating a weekly food plan. When you're faced with the double threat of being on a budget and trying to stay within a certain calorie range, planning meals for a week can get tricky. I've spent hours trying to figure out how to use an entire bunch of green onions, a head of broccoli and a pint of cottage cheese before they pass the expiration date, without resorting to eating like a scavenger. Men aren't the only ones who need a little variety.
I have spent days researching dieting sites. My requirements were: a site that allowed me to select foods I want to emphasize in my weekly plan (like whole grains) and eliminate those that I want to exclude (like red meat). I also wanted it to give me recipes for the days I feel like cooking, but allow me the flexibility to incorporate convenience foods when needed. Most importantly I wanted the site to lay out a weekly meal plan with three meals and two snacks a day so that I don't have to spend precious time doing it myself. I chose eDiets.com because it met my criteria and has 22 diet options to choose from.
After a basic setup in which you choose the meal plan that fits your needs (I chose the standard eDiets.com weight loss plan), I got my first weekly menu. It does technically delliver what was promised but not without a few glitches. For example, if I want to eat the same recipe more than once in the week I have to manually substitute it for one the computer automatically chose for me, which requires a bit of work. Then my plan has me eating turkey for lunch and dinner on the same day. Ditto for tofu later in the week. Twice in the same week is exactly what I want. Twice in the same day, not so much. Goodbye variety. <sigh> I think the final straw was the peanut butter debacle. I was instructed to eat peanut butter on a bagel for breakfast. However, when I checked the label on my peanut butter I noticed that it has a lot more calories than the total listed for my meal. So I did a little research. The program recommends that you buy low-fat, no sugar added peanut butter. Easy enough. So far I've been to three stores and no one carries it. So what do I do? Apparently my meal planner feels strongly about incorporating this creamy goodness into my diet because I'm instructed to eat it about three times a week. Now I'm paranoid that the extra calories are going to destroy my ultimate goal of looking like a supermodel.
Apparently, I'm just going to have to improvise. I haven't ditched the computer-generated meal plan entirely, but I'm not following it to the letter either. I'm doing what I call the "InStyle Weddings-Weight Watchers-Oprah Boot Camp-eDiet." Aka, the IWWWOBCED, which in Swahili means "girl with tight buns." Check back for my next update; I promise it will be full of rants and raves about the new me. To quote an infamous family source who was known for body makeovers that never really happened, "I'm about to embark on a physical transformation never before seen by man. In three months you won't even recognize me." Let's pray for small favors.
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